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Episode 19: The Language of Horsepower
Walmart batteries, Appalachian radio, and the language that unifies car people.
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Caleb
Good morning and welcome to the International Race of Hammpions, coming to you live from where you get your broadcast. On tonight's episode, we've got tales of Walmart. We've got tales of detailing. We've got tales about tales. So we're going to kick it off with the Walmart report. From the one, the only, the glizzy gladiator of the Great Lakes, Gino!
Geno
Wow, what a— what an introduction. Okay, so, so let's see. Last week I was doing some work on the 940, and, uh, the battery that was in there, which I think came out of the previous owner's Honda, died twice because it was You know, just a little guy, little guy. And, uh, so I went out to get, uh, the biggest, uh, the biggest battery I could get for that car.
Caleb
So what you're telling me is the old battery was just too small to fit comfortably in the hole?
Geno
Yeah, it was the wrong— it was the wrong group size. It didn't— it didn't fit the hole down or nothing. It's just in there flapping free. It's like throwing a—
Justin "The Juice"
Hot dog in a hallway. Glizzy in a— glizzy in a, uh, the— what's the G word for a hallway?
Geno
Something that's too big for that glizzy.
Justin "The Juice"
Yeah.
Geno
So—
Caleb
Glizzy in a baguette.
Justin "The Juice"
I don't know why, but I want to say the word sluice. Sluice is a good word.
Geno
Anyway, so I, uh, I go out and I go to, go to Menards because my first instinct with this is to save big money on it. And, uh, pro tip for everybody out there, don't buy your batteries at auto parts stores. They cost a lot more and they've been sitting a lot longer. Get them from the big box.
Justin "The Juice"
Good tip, because I usually honestly go to freaking AutoZone to get a battery. So you're honestly— why am I not going to Walmart? You're right.
Geno
It's— they come out of the same factory in God knows where.
Justin "The Juice"
Actually, even freaking Lowe's has some car batteries. They don't have a great selection, but it's all Johnson Controls. Yeah, out here, out here in the hills of Tennessee, proper Johnson Control will keep you from throwing that hot dog down the hallway. That's true. I wonder if Ace Hardware has— because there's an Ace by me— I wonder if they have car batteries. They probably do.
Geno
Yeah, but anywho, so I go to Menards and they do have a battery that fits, but they have the smaller battery. And, uh, up here in the great white north, you want as many CCAs as you can cram into that thing.
Justin "The Juice"
So more like ECCAs, extra cold cranking amps.
Geno
We, we like our beers cold and our cranking amps colder.
Justin "The Juice"
Hell yeah, brother.
Caleb
That's been one of my frustrations here because some, some idiot before me put a damn 40, uh, 40 amp-hour battery in the Fiat and it calls for a 60. And, you know, a couple dead, short out a couple cells and suddenly you ain't got juice.
Justin "The Juice"
As my dad always references as a cold place, just as like the standard, like if he's gonna say like He's gonna make a reference and use somewhere as an example of a place that's cold. International Falls, Minnesota is the place he always says. Yeah, it is cold. I've looked it up. It seems like it's probably pretty cold there.
Geno
It's probably all right right now. But generally, yes.
Justin "The Juice"
You go there and it's like -20 in the dead of summer. Like, fuck, like 20 miles north into Canada, it's fine. But for some reason, International Falls is just still constant winter.
Geno
I was about to say, there is only one month in Minnesota history without recorded snowfall.
Justin "The Juice"
Would that be August?
Geno
It's July, actually.
Justin "The Juice"
Okay, okay, that checks out.
Caleb
Okay.
Geno
Yeah.
Justin "The Juice"
Well, we're gonna change that.
Geno
You know, with, uh, with climate change being the way it is, that's very possible.
Caleb
I mean, but either that or the nuclear winter.
Justin "The Juice"
Christmas in July.
Geno
So I, I get back in the car and I go over to the Walmart in— this would be, I think this was the— yeah, this was the one in Little Canada. Go over to Walmart in Little Canada. Little Canada, which is the name of a city in the Twin Cities metropolitan area. That is so fucking Midwestern.
Justin "The Juice"
So Minnesota.
Geno
So anyway, I go to the little Canada Walmart, eh? So I go to the little Canada Walmart, bud, and I go get the battery off of the shelf and I throw it in the cart because I took a cart because batteries are heavy. I don't want to lug that thing all the way around. And I go up to the checkout and the lady at the checkout says, oh, actually you gotta buy those back at the automotive desk.
Justin "The Juice"
And I said, okay. You said, what is that, a boot?
Geno
Yeah. Oh geez, sorry bud, I didn't know.
Justin "The Juice"
Because we're in Little Canada.
Geno
Anyway, which—
Justin "The Juice"
they got Canadian Tire there.
Geno
It's probably been, you know, it's probably been a decade since I've set foot in a fucking Walmart. That's actually not true. I went there and bought, uh, I bought some of their Super Best or whatever the Super Tech brand gear oil is because that's the one people seemed to like for the Subaru that I never actually put it in. Because I crushed it first.
Justin "The Juice"
I'm gonna make some gear oil scented cologne.
Geno
God, gear lube stinks like so much ass.
Justin "The Juice"
It's the worst smelling shit. I, I've recently been covered in it from it from the expedition and I wanted to die.
Geno
I was gonna try and pull the, the ring and pinion from that 244 I scrapped last year. For a guy on Turbo Bricks. And, uh, the rear end was sort of— I couldn't get one of the axles out because the nut— the bolts that hold the ends in were just rounding off. And I said, well, screw it, now I don't have to smell gear lube.
Justin "The Juice"
There you go.
Geno
Yeah. Um, anyway, I go back to the automotive desk and there's nobody there. Okay, that's not true. There are 3 other customers there, but there's nobody working there. And there's a little thing on there that says press if you need assistance. So I press it, and about 10 minutes later, because I timed it, somebody comes out and helps the woman who was there before me. And then goes away and fucks off. So I press it again, and after another 15 to 20 minutes, he's like, comes out like, oh, how can I help you? I'm like, I just want to buy this battery, man. So he sells me the battery, and you know, he's like, oh, make sure you keep your receipt. Like, you can get that $10 core charge back, you just have to bring it back in. And I'm thinking like, fuck, why? So I can wait half an hour to get $10 out of you? Like, if I wanted to get $10 in half an hour, like, I'd go to work and spend $10 of it shitting.
Justin "The Juice"
Yeah.
Geno
I'm not gonna drive, you know, 30 minutes round trip and wait for 30 minutes at this desk for you to give me a $10 refund on this battery core. I'll just do the responsible thing and throw it in the nearest ocean.
Justin "The Juice"
It's true. Now, Walmart Automotive experiences are always a trip outside of just buying some basic stuff there and bringing it out to the, to the typical checkout.
Geno
Yeah.
Justin "The Juice"
If you're trying to get, if you're trying to get anything, um, a little more specialized done, it's always a trip. I remember one time, um, I had a tire blowout, uh, outside of Indianapolis. And, uh, I had the only auto center that was open, uh, or the only tire place that was open that was like anywhere near, um, was in a Walmart Auto Center. Um, and I'm sitting in the freaking waiting room and some guy starts talking to me about his, uh, about— he starts, he starts going on a whole rant about his ex-wife. and how his, uh, he's trying to like, you know, provide for his kid. And then he starts going on some, um, uh, some— he starts going on about something I don't even remember. And then he hands me a card with his Instagram on it, and I'm like, what? What is happening?
Caleb
What the hell?
Geno
Do we need to print off cards with our socials on them for the show? Because That sounds ridiculous, and I'm here for it. Like, you know, like, the real pisser of the whole thing is too, is I'm gonna wind up taking that battery there, not because I need the $10, but just because I want the fucker out of my garage.
Justin "The Juice"
Yeah.
Caleb
What do you mean? You don't have oceans in Minnesota?
Geno
We gotta— we got an inland sea.
Justin "The Juice"
Has a Has, has there any— have any auto parts stores or, um, automotive dealerships, um, really screwed you over or pissed you off? Because I would just leave the battery on their lot.
Geno
I mean, really pissed me off, no. But this is a, this is a good segue into my next rant, and this rant is specifically directed At the U-Polar Parts in Rosemount. Not the East Bethel U-Polar Parts. Y'all are cool, I fuck with y'all. Rosemount.
Caleb
Didn't we go there when I picked up the 940? I feel like we went to the one in Rosemount when we went— when I picked up the 940.
Geno
I think we probably did. I don't remember if we got anything there.
Caleb
I think I picked up some like trim or something, or, you know, pocketful of relays.
Justin "The Juice"
But yeah, anytime I'm at a— anytime I'm at a pick and pull, I, uh, I add to my car badge, um, collection.
Geno
As you do.
Justin "The Juice"
Yeah, I mean, normally, you know, well, I don't need to— I was gonna say toolbox is good for certain things when you're walking in there, and one of them is car badges.
Caleb
510 Bosch relays. Anything that's an awful lot of them doesn't count, but, uh, yep.
Geno
Anyway, so I'm at the U-Haul there. I'm at the U-Pull-N-Rosemount because they're doing a Labor Day sale and it's 40% off, and I would love to go into—
Justin "The Juice"
Are you telling me, are you telling me you were laboring on Labor Day? That's a sin.
Geno
I went on Sunday. Okay.
Justin "The Juice"
All right. All right. That's fine. Karl Marx is all right with that.
Caleb
See, I don't recognize the American Labor Day because that is not International Workers' Day.
Geno
May Day is the superior holiday.
Justin "The Juice"
That's fair.
Caleb
That's absolutely—
Geno
Anywho, uh, they're running a 40% off sale for Labor Day and they just got, uh, A '96 960 sedan in, and I personally need, uh, the rear window glass. And I got a friend who's got a 940 with a leaky sunroof that's not on the track. And I said, well, if the glass one is still there on the 960, I'll get you that. It's a nicer part anyway.
Justin "The Juice"
Is it a— is it— was it a metal sunroof that he had or a moonroof?
Geno
It's the— they got the— it's not metal, it's like a plastic thing, but it's—
Justin "The Juice"
yeah, it's not glass. No.
Caleb
All right.
Justin "The Juice"
Yeah, that is nicer than to have the glass one.
Geno
Yeah. But so I go in there and, uh, I don't know if the checkout people at Rosemount get some sort of commission on how much they charge each individual person for, but When your yard price list lists sunroof assembly and sunroof glass only as separate items, glass only is part of assembly. It's not a separate line item. Otherwise it would be sunroof mechanism, sunroof glass only.
Justin "The Juice"
I worked in a parts department. I would agree with that assessment.
Geno
But that motherfucker there charged me for sunroof assembly, and sunroof glass only.
Justin "The Juice"
Well, you should have thrown them underneath the fucking 940 and kicked out the, the wheels holding it up.
Geno
Well, there's a 40% off sale, so there's 30 people behind me in the checkout line at the junkyard.
Justin "The Juice"
So, so you just went through with it?
Geno
I just went through it. I mean, it's at the end of the day, it's like $7 extra and I have a job, but it must be nice.
Justin "The Juice"
No offense, Justin. I'm out here struggling detailing cars.
Geno
That's not how this works. Like, this is the sunroof assembly. The glass is part of the assembly. That's not an extra charge. And also, he broke the cardinal rule of junkyards. He found every little scrap of crap I'd thrown in there and charged me for it. I'm surprised he didn't count the fucking screws in my tool bag. Like, that's the other thing. You're a junkyard. If somebody's buying big items, you let some small items through.
Justin "The Juice"
You don't need to charge me—
Geno
No. Yeah, you don't need to charge me $4 for each of the window switches I had in there. You don't need to. Yeah, let some of that stuff through. Like, in my head I was like, okay, this is gonna be like a $60, $75 checkout after the discount. No, it's like $110. So like, still a good deal, but like—
Caleb
It's not the screaming deal that it should have been.
Geno
And it's just like not how junkyards work. East Bethel, that would have been a $60 to $75 purchase, guaranteed.
Justin "The Juice"
Sounds like somebody needs a bee infestation.
Geno
I mean, could be worse. Uh, could be the guy I know who went there Last time he went there, he was looking for a spare tire for a Honda, pulled up the bit in the back of the CR-V, and somebody'd taken a dump in the spare tire.
Caleb
It was summertime too, wasn't it?
Geno
Probably. Although winter yard is pretty fun. I like winter yard.
Caleb
Winter yard is always good.
Justin "The Juice"
I'm, I'm a wuss. I hate working in the winter. It's too cold.
Geno
I do too, but like winter yard is kind of fun. Like as long as you don't have to do anything serious. Yeah.
Justin "The Juice"
If you're pulling a window switch or something. I mean, yeah.
Caleb
Hell, I would go and pay Young the $2 to get into the Pick 'n Pull in Kansas City just Just to wander around the yard and get ideas.
Geno
That's another thing. It's not two bucks no more at the U-Pull. They upped it to three. Inflation is out of control.
Justin "The Juice"
That's disgusting.
Caleb
That's just that's three bucks to get in a junkyard. Uh uh uh uh.
Justin "The Juice"
That's criminal. Inflation is out of control. That is criminal.
Geno
It used to be Obama.
Justin "The Juice"
Yeah, thanks Obama. It used to be a dollar. At, um, pull-apart here in Tennessee. I haven't been in a hot minute, so, uh, I'll have to see what it is now. But, um, no, I completely lost my train of thought. I was gonna make another joke. I completely lost my train of thought. Damn.
Caleb
I mean, I used to get in free, but, uh, at the time I worked for a DOD contractor. So, you know, they give you like the military ID card. You know, to log into your government computer. And well, the only difference is the contractor one has a green stripe and no one outside the government knows what that green stripe means. So I just waved that to get in for free.
Geno
Doing the Lord's work.
Caleb
Hell yeah. Amen, brother.
Justin "The Juice"
I remember what I was going to say. I hate working on cars when it's cold so much. that, um, I, uh, when I hit that coyote on the Stagea and I had to, um, do some, um, uh, zip tie, uh, kung fu, uh, in order to get the, uh, bumper back together, um, I decided the best course of action when it was like -10 degrees outside was to stay in my garage with the heater while using a, um, soldering iron to melt holes in my bumper to put the zip ties through. So, uh, if, if the vaping doesn't give me cancer, that definitely did.
Caleb
I'm pretty sure I got cancer from when I built the headlight harness for the Fiat, so I'm right there with you.
Justin "The Juice"
Oh yeah, that smelled— that was— I was, I was inhaling some plastic smoke.
Caleb
That was bad.
Geno
I think for me it's the years of washing my hands with brake clean. Good brake clean too.
Caleb
Yeah.
Justin "The Juice"
Well, I mean, look, even people, even, even retail workers with the fricking receipts, you know, that's given them cancer too. They just changed over from the cancer-causing receipts to new stuff and people are complaining about it.
Caleb
Got the, uh, got the old heat gun, plugged her in, hit the switch, and, uh, you know the old Harbor Freight tool smell? Like the 2008 era Harbor Freight?
Justin "The Juice"
Oh yeah, for sure.
Caleb
Where you could just feel the cancer?
Justin "The Juice"
Chinesium special.
Caleb
It, it had that stank.
Justin "The Juice"
I love that smell until, until the part breaks.
Caleb
You know, but also it was a $7 heat gun that's 1500 watts, I think, or it gets hot. It says 500 degrees Celsius on the box. I don't know if it actually hits that, but it did, did an awful good job on the heat shrink. And that's why I needed it for. But between that and then the stank from the similar top-tier soldering iron that I picked up and good old rosin core solder over here.
Justin "The Juice"
Looks good.
Caleb
Got the old rosin core. Between those, I'm pretty sure I got like 5 different types of cancer just building that wiring harness.
Justin "The Juice"
So not lead-free.
Caleb
Uh, actually, let me read it. I think this one may actually be lead-free. Let's see. Does not have an expiration date. That's nice. Uh, no, this is a tin one. It is tin solder with a resin core.
Justin "The Juice"
Well, that's just a shame.
Caleb
So at least it's lead-free, so I'm not gonna— I'm not gonna get cancer from the solder itself, I'm going to get cancer from the resin core. It's all right. I mean, Lord, please cure the cancer before it turns into cancer. Amen.
Justin "The Juice"
Amen. Amen, brother. Amen. Oh, that's funny.
Caleb
No.
Geno
All right.
Caleb
Let me get out on them trickle charger past week or so. And, uh, Pretty sure I've got a couple bad cells in it or it's sulfated or whatever, because battery ain't gone above half a charge.
Justin "The Juice"
And let me get one more. Oh, sorry. I thought you were done.
Caleb
Yeah, go right ahead.
Justin "The Juice"
No, I was just going to say, I'm going to get myself one more novelty beverage before I start telling my tales.
Geno
If face made for radio were a Broadcast. That'd be us.
Justin "The Juice"
Hey, hey, I think I you know I think I'm hot, but you know that's just my narcissism speaking.
Caleb
Tovarish, you want automobile? Come on down, talk to my friend Crazy Ivan. Ignore the black Volga. Is nobody's car. Go quietly in the truck. Sign da on the dotted line. We'll take care of the rest. Crazy Ivan's Automotive Center.
Justin "The Juice"
Duh. Big Bill Hale's.
Caleb
Good old Big Bill Hale. Shout out Big Bill Hale's Used Cars.
Justin "The Juice"
We'll fuck your wife.
Caleb
Guaranteed. Yep. And I think this is a good time to, uh, do a shout out to our affiliate. over in East Tennessee. And since we got an East Tennessean on the broadcast, I'm going to pass it over to Justin.
Justin "The Juice"
You are listening to WORS, the worst station you can think of, all the way from Jacksboro to Seymour and Ballplay. 1,500 watts coming straight out of the hills of East Tennessee.
Caleb
91.1, the worst.
Justin "The Juice"
91.1, the worst. And now the international race of hampians.
Caleb
Man, see, we're doing good. I mean, we got the whiz and we got the worst. We're doing pretty good.
Justin "The Juice"
Yeah, we got, we got the worst whiz.
Caleb
We do. Yeah.
Justin "The Juice"
See, I, I, 1,500 watts is good, but I, I mean, that's, that's a good amount of watts, but I, I couldn't, uh, I couldn't think of anything actually realistic. What is, is 1,500 realistic? I also wanted to get a 6'7 and a 69 joke in there, but I couldn't get it.
Caleb
I mean, 69. 69,000 watts is a realistic number of watts for a broadcast. All right.
Justin "The Juice"
69,000 watts of power broadcasting all the way through the hills of Appalachia, in and around. So much power, it's digging through the mountain.
Caleb
I mean, I remember back in the day, you know, Rock 92.3 used to talk about having 100,000 watts of power. So. I figure 69,420 is a good reasonable number.
Justin "The Juice"
That is a good reasonable number for amount of wattage.
Caleb
Yeah.
Justin "The Juice"
69,000 watts of power shooting straight through the Cumberland Gap.
Caleb
Coming to you out of Seymour Ballplay.
Justin "The Juice"
With, with affiliates in Seymour. Ballplay, Jacksboro, and the Cumberland Gap.
Caleb
Do not like. You know, if this show wasn't already rated as explicit, we would probably get it for this one.
Geno
You know, I watched—
Justin "The Juice"
I, um, I watched a video about the, uh, the Cumberland Gap Tunnel and how the, um— I didn't realize that it was only opened in like 2003 or something.
Caleb
Yeah, I remember when it opened.
Justin "The Juice"
I thought that shit was way older than that.
Caleb
No, man.
Justin "The Juice"
There used to be a highway that like people died on constantly, and now it's just the Cumberland Trail. Like they completely like demolished it and just turned it into a walking trail again. Like that's the wildest shit.
Caleb
You know, we used to do great things in the state of Tennessee.
Geno
Yeah.
Justin "The Juice"
This, we used to be a real country.
Caleb
It used to be a real state.
Geno
Yeah.
Justin "The Juice"
We still got the Vols. It's okay.
Caleb
Go Vols!
Justin "The Juice"
Go Vols, baby. Do you see them? The freaking—
Caleb
Hail, save 'em, fall winds.
Justin "The Juice"
I'm hyped. I'm hyped for this season. I mean, we got it. We got Faison Brandon, who I'm making like laser noises for because Faison sounds like phasers. So every time he's he's laser in the ball because he's got a hell of a spiral on him. I'm like pew pew pew pew.
Caleb
Yeah, it's like he's kind of it's like a laser cannon or something he's got, man. Yeah, he's got.
Justin "The Juice"
He's just like fire the phasers. But uh, he's a. He's like fresh as hell. He is the freshest freshman you could fresh, and he is— he already looks like a junior. Like, dude's a baller. He is exactly who I wanted, uh, Nico Iamaliava to be, and instead Nico decided to be a traitor little baby and, you know, wuss on out to UCLA.
Caleb
Yeah, them West Coasters don't know good football.
Justin "The Juice"
No, he's he's a West Coaster from heart, and he seemed like it, and I was hoping good things for him, but it did not. He he never it just he never he never really just didn't pan out. He never looked like he never looked like he like a five-star quarterback. He just I was like what why how is this guy supposed to be good? He doesn't look all that good, but Faison. Let me tell you right now, Faizon looks like a baller.
Caleb
He does, man.
Justin "The Juice"
I do think it's funny that his name's Faizon Brandon because that just seems like it should be the other way around. It should be Brandon Faizon.
Caleb
But yeah, it feels like it flows better, you know?
Justin "The Juice"
It does. But you know what? All I gotta say is pew pew.
Caleb
Hey, as long as he keeps firing that ball like that. Man, y'all got a good team this year.
Justin "The Juice"
I'mma fire my laser.
Geno
Bah!
Justin "The Juice"
I should get myself a rifle of some sort. I am firmly against an AR just because of the— it's too chud.
Caleb
Now, I'm gonna throw out a suggestion here, and this is a terrible suggestion, but a beautiful piece of machinery. FN 90.
Justin "The Juice"
FN 9. Do I know the FN 90? I know the FN, uh, FN FAL. Wait, a P90?
Caleb
I think, yeah, I have a P90.
Justin "The Juice"
Oh my God, I love the P90. Yeah, I'll give me a P9, but that takes 5.7. That's expensive ammo.
Geno
That shit is expensive.
Justin "The Juice"
My friend actually, my friend actually just recently got a Kel-Tec 5.7 pistol. And so I've shot— I actually have shot, uh, I, I somehow have shot 5.7 before out of a Kel-Tec pistol, and it's a stripper clip 5.7 pistol. It's the stupidest thing. It's full polymer. It's the lightest damn gun in the world, but it, it, it shot pretty fun. It was, it was a fun thing to plink with.
Caleb
Oh yeah, I went, uh, there's a—
Geno
I mean, like, the thing is though, if you're plinking Just get a fucking 10/22.
Justin "The Juice"
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. We were plinking it because he, uh, they had just bought it and it was— it's, it's a toy. It's, it's a 5.7 polymer Kel-Tec. It's just a toy. And we were like, we want to shoot some 5.7 for the hell of it because we were like, holy— we— it was used at the gun store and we were like, oh my God, that's a 5.7 pistol. I want to shoot some Five-Sevens because it's like really round and weird looking. Not the, not the, not the bullet, uh, not the ammo, but the gun itself. Uh, that Five-Seven, uh, Kel-Tec is a weird-ass gun. Uh, it's not a fantastic gun, but it was fun to shoot.
Caleb
I mean, hell, the FN Five-Seven pistol is also kind of a weird piece of machinery, but man, it's—
Justin "The Juice"
it is 5.7 is, is definitely expensive and not com— not super common, but like, it's a cool round, uh, you know, it's a pretty impressive round. And I mean, if, if I had— the P90 has been one of my favorite guns of all time just because of how futuristic it, it looks and like space age it looks. So like—
Caleb
I know.
Justin "The Juice"
I mean, I would kill to— I would kill to have a P90, and I bet you that thing does not recoil at all being a bullpup 5.7. I mean, 5.7 is basically .22.
Geno
Like, yeah, it's, uh, I mean, the, the only thing that looks more futuristic than the P90 is the, uh, the HK G11, and they barely even made that thing. Like, it never went into full production.
Justin "The Juice"
Yeah, yeah.
Caleb
Like, you know, 5.7 though, it's just .22 with Belgian characteristics.
Geno
I mean, like Excuse me. You know, if they really wanted to market it, they should have predicted the trends and just gone one millimeter bigger.
Justin "The Juice"
Six.
Caleb
FN, if y'all, if anyone from FN is listening to this broadcast. You have your new marketing department right here.
Geno
The FN 6.7.
Justin "The Juice"
There it is, there it is.
Geno
I'm 90% certain that the barrel on the AR I built is an FN barrel.
Justin "The Juice"
What about, what about, uh, what about the, uh— no, I think the most futuristic gun that was actually produced a decent bit was the, the FN F2000. You know what I'm talking about? How they integrated—
Caleb
Oh, I know what you're talking about. That thing was cool.
Justin "The Juice"
That's futuristic as hell. What is FN doing? Those Belgian-ass motherfuckers are going crazy.
Caleb
I know. It's, it's like they saw Demolition Man and thought, we can make that shit. You know what?
Justin "The Juice"
I appreciate them for it.
Caleb
Now, if only we could get to where all the restaurants were Taco Bell.
Justin "The Juice"
3, 3 seashells.
Geno
He doesn't know.
Caleb
We never have seashells. Yeah, just be real careful with the third one.
Justin "The Juice"
Yeah, yeah, it's—
Geno
the G11 is just such a ridiculous concept.
Justin "The Juice"
The G11 is a ridiculous concept. Yeah, I, I know about that gun. That thing's— and I would like— it has like the sabot— it has like sabot ammo or some shit, right?
Caleb
It Yeah, it's crazy.
Geno
Like it's got that weird like rotating fucking.
Justin "The Juice"
Yeah.
Caleb
Yeah.
Justin "The Juice"
Crazy as shit. Crazy as shit. But you know at the end of the day, at the end of the day, none of this fancy bullshit works. You know what works?
Geno
SKS.
Justin "The Juice"
SKS.
Caleb
Kalashnikov.
Justin "The Juice"
AK-47. Mosin Nagant.
Geno
Simonov carbine. All you need, comrade.
Justin "The Juice"
All you need. All you need.
Caleb
Oh man, I'm just—
Justin "The Juice"
I love, I love seeing it done.
Geno
If gun somehow break— won't break, but if somehow break, is also spear. If spear somehow break, is still club. Yes, I decided on a nod to Brazil with my, my beverage here. This, this whiskey's been all over Caleb's wood, you know.
Justin "The Juice"
I'm not gonna ask.
Geno
Uh, is it Amburana cask?
Caleb
Uh, yeah.
Justin "The Juice"
Uh, no, I just think I, I have, I have escaped the gang wars out here in, uh, the hills of East Tennessee, but I have not escaped the, uh, insane rednecks who are, who are just shooting for fun. But see, you know, I love the insane rednecks though. Those are my people.
Geno
Exactly. They are fun, but it's also like, you know, like, as fun as it is to think about going prairie dogging with a .50 cal, at the end of the day, it's just dumb.
Justin "The Juice"
It is dumb. You don't want a .50 cal. That's dumb as shit.
Geno
I mean, like, I want a .50 cal, but—
Justin "The Juice"
No, yeah, yeah, for the range.
Geno
Anti-materiel purposes.
Justin "The Juice"
Yeah, you know, for blowing up technicals. We need more technicals in East Tennessee.
Geno
We need just more technicals in the US.
Justin "The Juice"
We need more technicals. Uh, you know, do you think I could make a technical out of the Expedition? I know it's not a pickup, but it's based on a pickup platform.
Geno
Okay, here's the thing. Ute conversion on the Stagea technical.
Caleb
Be the change you want to see in the world.
Justin "The Juice"
You know, I would be very, very internet famous if I did that.
Geno
I've thought, like, I have considered it multiple times with the 245.
Justin "The Juice"
The internet is a mistake, but also the greatest thing we have ever made as human beings.
Caleb
It kind of really is. I mean, I wouldn't have met my wife without the internet. Hell.
Justin "The Juice"
We wouldn't have this broadcast without the internet.
Caleb
We would not. We'd not have met Gino.
Justin "The Juice"
It's true. This broadcast is the greatest thing on planet Earth.
Geno
So yes.
Caleb
Yep. Hey, we are the greatest broadcast on Earth.
Justin "The Juice"
Bank it. Yeah. Um, I never really got into talking about, um, my, uh, what I've been doing this week. Which is having massive levels of autistic burnout and mental health issues. But then also, I needed some money. And my dad rudely implemented on— not implemented, but imposed onto my uncle. He's like, you should have him detail your car. And I was like, bro, okay. Sure, whatever. My uncle's like, yeah, fine, I'll pay you. So, because my uncle's, my uncle's down here for, uh, this week, uh, my, my uncle and my parents are going to a funeral in Atlanta, uh, for my, on my dad's side. Um, and, uh, he's got a 2018 Civic, uh, EXT Coupe, so it's a turbo coupe.
Caleb
Oh, nice.
Justin "The Juice"
Uh, automatic. Uh, black.
Caleb
Got that turd blow.
Justin "The Juice"
It's got that turbo.
Geno
It's black. But it's auto tragic.
Justin "The Juice"
It is auto tragic, unfortunately, but it's a coupe, so that's kind of cool. Um, he's from New York, about an hour outside New York City.
Geno
New York City?
Justin "The Juice"
Mom Donnie stan.
Geno
Um, And, uh, we're all Bob Downey stans here.
Justin "The Juice"
You're goddamn right. Uh, that thing gets kept outside, so the paint isn't exactly in great shape, especially it being black. Uh, it's got some sun damage on the back, uh, some fading. It needs a buff and a half for sure. But, um, I was like, this bitch needs ceramic coat. like real bad because, you know, put some water on it and that— it does not bead, it sheets. And I'm like, oof. So I washed it, I hand washed it, I ceramic coated it, uh, wheels included. Um, it's got some decent wheels on it, honestly, but they got some black, black and silver, so the, you know, they got paint on it. So I definitely need some ceramic coating. Um, vacuumed the entire interior, uh, interior detailed all the surfaces, all the plastic bits. It was some interior detailer.
Caleb
Um, didn't you say it had hay in the trunk?
Justin "The Juice"
Had a whole bunch of hay in the trunk.
Caleb
Um, I mean, what's he doing hauling Mr. Ed around?
Justin "The Juice"
It's for feral cats, apparently. Uh, my, my aunt and uncle are all about their cats. They got like 8 of them. Uh, so apparently it was from like, uh, all he said it was something to do with my aunt carrying feral cats around. I'm like, why is there hay involved? But whatever.
Caleb
I mean, um, I'm, I'm no cat expert. I've only got 2 of them here in the Brazilian But I have never for the life of me seen a cat eating hay or wanting anything to do with hay.
Justin "The Juice"
I don't know, maybe it was bedding. I'm not sure what the deal was, but there was a bunch of hay in the trunk and I was like, that's wild. So the whole thing was just absolutely, uh, it needed some cleaning. Uh, no, no shade to my uncle, I just— it needed some cleaning. Um, so, uh, took quite some time to, to vacuum all that hay up because I'm— when I detail a car, I detail a car, you know. I didn't half-ass it. I went— I'm like, this bitch is gonna be clean enough, like factory, right? Like clean enough to eat off of. All the windows, including like the rear window, because it's a coupe, it's real sloping back and it's hard to get to. Uh, it's hard to clean because all the windows had a bunch of streaking and a bunch of— they haven't been cleaned in forever. They were, they were nasty and had a whole bunch of nastiness on them. Took a lot. So you just—
Caleb
so basically you went, you went cleaning from the window to the wall.
Justin "The Juice"
Uh, and the sweat definitely dripped down my balls. Uh, unfortunately all the bitches did not crawl. There are no bitches. Uh, I'm, I'm still no bitches. Uh, like the, uh, you know, the, uh, the, the Megamind meme, or the— you know what I'm talking about? No bitches. That's sort of what's happening right now, unfortunately. I'll, I'll get— I, I mean, I'll either be the bitch or get some bitches at some point here soon, but my parents got to get out of here first.
Caleb
Por qué no los dos?
Justin "The Juice"
That's fair. Why not both? Yeah, I'll go. I'll go full lesbian on them.
Caleb
I am.
Justin "The Juice"
I mean, I am getting. I am lean. I am recognizing that the the gender things I went through were were a bit more legit than I thought they were. So I am a bit more. non-binary these days. I just need to fucking shave. Um, so, you know, I can be the bitch and also have the bitches at the same time, you know what I'm saying? Um, nonetheless, um, yeah, I'm, I'm the resident queer here, so I, I will, I will be as queer as possible. But, uh, at the same— you know what's, you know what's funny? I want to be, I want to be some— I want to—
Caleb
Okay.
Justin "The Juice"
This is a total aside, but, um, one time I was, uh, when I was a full trans girl, I was like, uh, fucking, uh, all dolled up and wearing some hot-ass clothes, and I got catcalled for the first time. And it was simultaneously, like, in public, it was simultaneously, uh, super exciting and affirming and also terrifying. And what I want to do is I want to look like, uh, like a hot-ass bitch and then have— still have this fucking low-ass voice and just be like, yeah, bro, sup? I just want to call— I want to cause chaos. I want to cause chaos.
Geno
I've, I've only been catcalled once in my life and it was by large Black women, so it was just, just a very lovely experience for me.
Justin "The Juice"
Shout out.
Geno
I was probably— I was in my mid-20s. I was in my full Frankenfurter getup.
Justin "The Juice"
Okay, that'll do it. That'll do it. That'll do it.
Geno
5-inch heels on, walking across the street from the McDonald's in Uptown to the Uptown Theater where they do Rocky. And I hear this woman just be like, damn, white boy, you killing them heels. And I'm just sitting there like, I am, aren't I?
Justin "The Juice"
I'm a fruity friend sign.
Geno
I've never felt more like— I haven't felt better about myself physically than I did at that particular moment.
Justin "The Juice"
But, but, uh, no, the other time was, uh, when I was, uh, not presenting quite like— oh no, more not presenting quite as femininely, but I had my nails painted And this freaking, uh, cashier at the drive-through at Wendy's, she was like, oh my God, I love your nails, you're so pretty, oh my God, yes. And I was like, oh my God, yes. Columbus. Columbus is gay as shit and I fucking love it. Um, but nonetheless, um, I'm still a Southerner and would rather be in the South. But Columbus, shout out Columbus, Ohio. Underrated place. Columbus is great. Just Ohio State sucks.
Geno
But I guess on the flip side of my one Rocky story was the time I was going to a very different Rocky showing in River Falls, Wisconsin, at the university there and got the F-slur screamed at me out of a truck. And that was terrifying.
Justin "The Juice"
Yeah, that's happened too. Um, shit sucks. Shit's scary.
Geno
I guess I'm gonna say this, like, you know what, everybody should do Rocky in full getup because it's the only way for straights to understand how women and queers are treated.
Justin "The Juice"
Yes, 100,000%. Exactly.
Geno
And also it's fun as hell and you will never find a more fun and accepting group of people than at a Rocky horror showing.
Justin "The Juice"
People don't fucking get it. Also, you know what's obnoxious is the, is the discourse around that. Like, um, people, you know, a lot of like, um, terminally online trans people on Bluesky or whatever will be like, Rocky's actually transphobic. And it's like, look, in today's— if that came out in today's day and age, I suppose it might be. But how fucking progressive it was for the time. And also it was saying like, this is how straight people think of queer people. So it was more of a commentary than anything. So like, you gotta think about it deeper. Stop being 12 years old. Fuck off. Be an adult. Understand the situation. Understand the history behind it. Like, I am a— I, I support the fucking Rocky Horror like cosplaying and shit.
Geno
Like, I would, I would go so much.
Justin "The Juice"
I want, I want to go again. Yeah, I want to go.
Caleb
I'm old.
Justin "The Juice"
I haven't done it.
Geno
I can't stay up that late.
Justin "The Juice"
That's fair. It's—
Geno
I mean, it's— imagine, like, it's, you know, yeah, like, imagine going pretty late right now, starting now.
Justin "The Juice"
Yeah, yeah, yeah, fuck that shit.
Geno
I'm going to bed.
Justin "The Juice"
I'm already starting to feel that, and I'm not even 30 yet, so I'm about to be, but Um, nonetheless, uh, yeah, so detailing my uncle's car, um, it took literally 2 days because I, I did stop and start a little bit because we were going to lunch, we were doing other things. I got caught up and shit. But God, that was a lot of fucking effort because I really wanted to do a good job on it to make him— his car be like clean as shit, uh, to go to that funeral, uh, and Couple days, or I guess tomorrow now that it's past midnight. I think they're leaving tomorrow, September 11th.
Caleb
And now I'm verb 9/11.
Justin "The Juice"
9/11. But yeah, I wanted to. I yeah, I kind of wanted to be. I kind of wanted him to be like. proud of is like happy and like, you know, like, damn, my car is clean for going to like a family event. So I, um, I really did a good job on it and I'm, I'm pretty happy with the job I did. It just took absolutely forever. It took a shit ton of elbow grease, but that damn Civic is clean as hell now. So I'm happy with that, the job I did. Um, But yeah, that's what I've been doing. I've spent 2 days detailing a fucking Civic. Uh, and, uh, yeah, hopefully he appreciates it. I mean, he's paying me like some money for it, but nonetheless, I really was just doing it out of like, you know, family sort of appreciation. Um, because I haven't seen him in years, so, um, The last time I saw him, he had a Prius, uh, so I didn't even realize he bought a Civic. So I'm like, hey, Civic Coupe, hell yeah, you got the coupe, baby. It's pretty cool.
Caleb
Now the real question is, did the Prius have the license plate Weeb?
Justin "The Juice"
No, no, no, it's— it was New York, New York Prius, not Tennessee, New York. Uh, hey, and then, you know, before that, before that, he had a, uh, like an EG Civic Coupe, like a, like a mid-'90s Civic Coupe.
Caleb
Oh, those are good.
Justin "The Juice"
Yeah, it was, it was stick. That thing was good as hell. Um, it was red, just, just classic-ass Civic. It got— one time when he was up here in Tennessee visiting. Um, it got sideswiped on the back roads and it got a mirror knocked off, which was— that's about right. Fuckers be crossing the line constantly. Um, and then apparently a few years after, like years after that, it got rear-ended to shit. And, uh, yeah, it's probably in a junkyard now, unfortunately.
Caleb
It's probably been crashed into a cube.
Justin "The Juice"
Yeah, it's probably, it's probably a Coca-Cola can at this point.
Caleb
Or a BYD.
Justin "The Juice"
Yeah, that, that would be funny. Build your dreams, baby. But yeah, I've, uh, this, this past week I've just been, uh, getting some stuff done, having some autistic burnout, kind of losing my mind a little bit, not having a great time mentally, uh, because there's just been so much going on. I've been really stressed out looking for work. Honestly, that's what sort of what's been really causing it. Um, but, um, I'm a— I've calmed down a bit tonight. Tonight's a good night. And, uh, tomorrow they're leaving. Uh, so I got one more day with— to see my uncle, which I— who I haven't seen in forever. And, uh, no, you know what's really funny? Um, so I'm detailing his car And what do I find in the door pocket? Uh, I find like 10 business cards for a No Kings protest.
Geno
Nice.
Justin "The Juice"
I'm like, hell yeah.
Caleb
You know, I think you're— I think your uncle might be the smarter of the brothers. He—
Justin "The Juice"
yes, yes, yes. Yes, very much so. Although he's still definitely a, uh, he's still definitely a boomer man in a lot of ways, and it's frustrating. But it's at least he's, at least he's a bit more lived up than my dad. But he's like a, he, he's like a PhD, or I don't know about PhD, but he's like a— I actually, I think PhD. Hmm.
Caleb
I don't know.
Justin "The Juice"
He's a psychologist. He, he had, he, he was a psychologist. So he's, he's a psychologist from New York. So I mean, he's quite a bit smarter than my dad. And it's the only— it's my dad's only brother. So yeah.
Caleb
He's got that Dr. Spock energy. Yeah.
Justin "The Juice"
Yeah. He's also, you know, he's also, he's also in the other room. So I don't want to say it too loud. But he also is definitely a lot more openly autistic than my dad, but I think like in a good way, you know, that's a, that's a good thing. I appreciate it, you know, not, not, not shade. In fact, love. I wish my dad was a little bit more accepting of how fucking autistic he is.
Caleb
See, that is autism complimentary, not derogatory.
Justin "The Juice"
Yes, complimentary, not derogatory.
Caleb
Much like the host of this show.
Justin "The Juice"
He's got, he's got, he's got like 8. He's got no kids and like 8 cats and like had like 2 birds, like, you know, freaking gang. But also he's like still like boomer libbed up to where he's like, you know, donates to PETA and doesn't understand that PETA sucks.
Caleb
I mean, to be fair, I am also a long-standing member of PETA, the People for the Eating of Tasty Animals.
Justin "The Juice"
Gang, gang, gang! Shout out the salmon I had for lunch today.
Caleb
I miss salmon. I should have salmon.
Geno
Here I am making— like, I made tacos tonight, but I used ground chicken because I'm a fatty.
Justin "The Juice"
We had, we had barbecue chicken, uh, we had barbecue pulled chicken last night, uh, that my mom And my sister pulled, uh, like they, they pulled themselves. And, uh, that was some good shit. My mom said made some au gratin potatoes. Those were fire. Like, it was good shit.
Caleb
Yeah, no, the other day I did, uh, slug burgers. Shout out Northern Mississippi for the slug burger.
Justin "The Juice"
I don't know what a slug burger is, but, uh, it sounds Southern enough for me to try it.
Caleb
Oh, you're gonna love this. So depending, most of the restaurants now use soy grits, but you mix either cornmeal, potato flakes, or soy into your ground beef to kind of extend it out further. And you make yourself your patty and you deep fry it. Oh, I love that.
Justin "The Juice"
So a deep-fried burger patty with soy grits in it?
Caleb
Yeah, pretty much. Um, but I got—
Justin "The Juice"
Where can I get one in East Tennessee?
Caleb
I don't know about East Tennessee, but I do know some good places in either Corinth, Mississippi or Selmer, Tennessee to get one.
Geno
Honestly, yeah, let's, let's, let's get together. Um, fuck. We should, we should come down there and bring the, bring the firearms and do a little range time.
Justin "The Juice"
Yeah, literally, literally, we can shoot in my backyard.
Geno
I'll throw my boat on the roof of the fucking car. I don't give a fuck.
Justin "The Juice"
Yeah, we got the— I got the lake. If, if this, if this ain't the place to take a boat, I mean, what is— are you talking like a kayak?
Geno
Uh, I have a 1975 Snowcat. Dark Sunflower.
Justin "The Juice"
I don't know what that is.
Geno
It's basically a Styrofoam cooler with a sail on it.
Justin "The Juice"
Fuck yeah, let's take it out on the lake. Now that, now that, now that Labor Day's over, there ain't nobody out on the lake. Like, Labor Day, the Labor Day weekend was the last hurrah for all the, the riffraff. So now it is, it is quiet.
Caleb
No, man. Well, I was gonna say though, going back, Slugburger. Shout out to Pat's Cafe in Selmer, Tennessee.
Justin "The Juice"
All right. I'll have to hit up Pat's Cafe in Selmer, Tennessee. Uh, let's get sponsored.
Geno
Yep.
Caleb
There's also the Slugburger Cafe and the White Trolley Cafe down in Corinth, Mississippi.
Geno
Uh, either of y'all ever listened to the podcast, uh, Old Gods of Appalachia?
Justin "The Juice"
No, but I should because that sounds right up my alley.
Geno
It's like an eldritch horror podcast set in Appalachia and it fucking whips.
Justin "The Juice"
That sounds awesome. It is spooky out here sometimes.
Geno
It's like good spookiness. The creators are, uh, politically—
Justin "The Juice"
All right, bet.
Geno
It's very, it's very queer. It's very fucking It's like, it's good.
Justin "The Juice"
So if you ever, if you ever are out here in the hills, in the holler, and you round a corner and you hear banjo music, everyone will tell you to run.
Geno
No, usually they tell me to squeal like a pig.
Justin "The Juice"
Well, you could do that.
Caleb
You could do that.
Justin "The Juice"
But no, everyone will tell you to run. They'll be like, if you hear banjo music out in the hills, run. Nah, we're white enough. It'll be okay. Yeah.
Geno
Old Gods of Appalachia. It's so fucking good.
Caleb
No, it's— that actually reminds me. So a friend of mine, former professor of mine, he actually just got the, you know, he had a cancer diagnosis, went through treatment. Got the, uh, not detectable anymore, all clear from Vanderbilt. So that's good. And, uh, he went celebrate by going to a bluegrass festival. And of course he's a bit of a fiddle player. 'Cause, and, uh, but it was real funny 'cause I remember it was at that same festival. About 14 years ago, where the two of us were sitting there at the bluegrass festival shooting the shit and came up with the idea for me to spend a summer running around the Southeast recording bluegrass for— as a research project. And that's what the banjos reminded me of.
Justin "The Juice"
That's awesome.
Caleb
That's awesome.
Justin "The Juice"
We got it. You know what? No, no, no.
Caleb
Sorry.
Justin "The Juice"
I didn't want to cut you off with that.
Geno
No.
Caleb
What I was going to say is shout out to my friend Larry. You did it. You're beating it. And also y'all come on the show sometime.
Justin "The Juice"
WORS FM, the powerhouse of the South. 69,000 watts of power rippling through the Appalachian Mountains, straight out of Jacksboro, Seymour, and ball play. If you want to see more ball play, come to Jacksboro.
Caleb
And we're back.
Justin "The Juice"
Come Berlin Mountains to check.
Geno
Sorry, almost got convinced to shop Crazy Ivan.
Justin "The Juice"
My best friend, uh, my best friend and my other best friend are married, and one of them is Venezuelan, and she just got her green card. So congrats to her.
Geno
Nice.
Caleb
Congratulations.
Geno
Oh, that's a funny experience. So, um, like at the Minnesota State Fair, we went, uh, we went the first Monday, and at the, uh, the Bazaar stage at the International Bazaar on that Monday, they did a naturalization ceremony and it was fucking great.
Justin "The Juice"
So one time I was drunk in Naples, Florida, and my Uber driver, because I was drunk at a bar, uh, and I needed to Uber home, um, was Cuban. Um, and I had a whole ass conversation with him using Google Translate on my phone. And that was one of the greatest experiences of my life, was my drunk ass riding half an hour home from a bar with a Cuban, uh, Uber driver, having a conversation entirely over Google Translate. Because I do not know a lick of Spanish. Um, and I was like, bro, I hope everything gets better because I really want to visit Cuba. And he was like, bro, I hope you can. I love you, man. And it was, it was just great.
Caleb
Yeah, like, I remember my last— actually, the trip I took to the airport hotel that I stayed in and my last night in Argentina before moving. You know, I'm sitting in the Uber, my driver's Venezuelan, and we're talking. And we just start talking, you know, just shooting the shit. And he's a diehard car guy. And, you know, we're just talking and he's talking about how he had a Fairlane, you know, a Ford Fairlane 500 in Venezuela. that he, like, one of his, like, things that hurt for him was that he had to sell that car to get money to get to freedom in Argentina. And for me as a car guy, that resonated.
Justin "The Juice"
Yeah.
Caleb
Because, you know, we were talking about old project cars and things like that. He mentioned his Fairlane. I talked about my '65 Olds that I had. But for me, it was just so beautiful though, that being in Argentina, being in a free country, and 2 people from very different backgrounds just sitting there in the car. with a common language, with cars that brought us to like just—
Justin "The Juice"
Cars, cars really do bring us all together.
Caleb
We have a common language. It's the language of horsepower.
Justin "The Juice"
It is. And that's, you know, but the, the thing is, is that it's interesting being a leftist car enthusiast who understands climate change but also is like, I still like internal I just wish everyone else would drive an electric car so I could have my fucking internal combustion engine without destroying the environment.
Caleb
And you know, I'm, I'm about to, you know, go like all James May, Richard Hammond over here. I feel like the synthetic fuels and the progress being made, yeah, is going to help with that.
Justin "The Juice"
And I'm a fan of hydrogen combustion too.
Caleb
Like, and I think about here in Brazil, when they really started ethanol production and ethanol-powered vehicles, the pollution went down significantly just by switching from gasoline to ethanol.
Justin "The Juice"
At the end of the day, the solution is every— everybody needs public transit and Trains.
Geno
Yeah.
Justin "The Juice"
I am a big fan of fucking trains. I think that on my everyday commute and on my everyday, like, drive— like, going around town and shit, I wish I could do it on a train. Now, out here in rural Tennessee, I understand that's a little less, um, that's a little bit more difficult. But anywhere that's anywhere near a city or a suburb, motherfuckers, y'all should have trains. Because the more trains there are, the less traffic there is.
Caleb
The more trains there are for you to trainspot.
Justin "The Juice"
The more trains I can trainspot and be autistic about. But also the less traffic there is, um, the less pollution there is, um, the easier it is for everyone else to get around even when they're drunk as fuck. And, um, it means that there's less traffic on the roads, which means I can fucking send it in my stagia every single day, baby. Is it selfish? A little bit, but it's also not at the end. It's selfishness in a non-selfish way, you know what I'm saying?
Geno
Like, I would love to be able to just like hop a train to fucking work.
Justin "The Juice"
It'd be great. Yeah, no, no, I love trains. I love riding trains. I would absolutely commute in a train every single fucking day. As long as it meant I could still fucking drive the back roads in my Stagea every once in a while. You know what I'm saying?
Caleb
Yeah. And that's actually been one of my bigger frustrations moving to Brazil is we don't have the train network or the subway network like I had in Buenos Aires.
Justin "The Juice"
And that's surprising. I would expect Brazil to have really good public transit.
Caleb
Like, we have buses.
Justin "The Juice"
Yeah, so does fucking Knoxville.
Caleb
But the problem with the buses here is the, uh, the fact the gangs tend to— they like to, uh, bus jack and use them as barricades to keep the cops out.
Justin "The Juice"
Oof, that's rough. You're having fun out there with all that fucking gang violence. That's That seems entertaining in a strange way.
Caleb
It is. Uh, let's just say my dark sense of humor has had plenty of material.
Justin "The Juice"
Yeah, well, I'm about to— we're about to experience that in the US in the next few years, I guarantee you. So don't you worry.
Caleb
Yeah, I'm trying to convince my wife that France is a good move, but She has made it clear she, she does not want to live in a country where she doesn't speak the language, where they don't speak her language.
Justin "The Juice"
Move to Portugal. Portugal is one of the greatest places on earth.
Caleb
Yeah, but then you gotta live with the Portuguese.
Justin "The Juice"
Ooh, that's fair.
Caleb
And I say this married to someone who has Portuguese citizenship. And whose grandmother is Portuguese.
Justin "The Juice"
All right, let's call it a broadcast. It's 1:30 in the morning.
Caleb
Let's call it a broadcast.
Justin "The Juice"
I gotta get to bed.
Caleb
All right, y'all check your oil. We'll see you next week.
Justin "The Juice"
Check your fucking oil. Bye everybody. Bye.
Caleb
Bye y'all.