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Episode 11: Bad Decisions and Great Music
Becoming Fiat-laden, imagining the worst possible engine swap and debating the best road trip music.
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Caleb
You're listening to 99.7 The HAMM, a Hammpions Broadcast International station coming out of Lutts, Cypress Inn, and Walnut Grove. This morning's episode of the International Race of Hammpions is brought to you by Antonio's Italian Car Specialists in Lutts, Tennessee. With over 30 years of experience, Antonio's will have you saying, "Fix it again, Tony." Give them a call today at 931-555-3428. That is 931-555-3428. And tell them The HAMM sent you. Good morning and welcome to the International Race of Hammpions, coming to you live from where you get your podcasts. On this week's show, we have more reports from the reservoir. We have more reports from the Glizzy Gladiator of the Great Lakes. And we have the final resolution to my automobile search saga. I'm Caleb, and I am joined here tonight with Justin and Geno.
Geno
Hello.
Caleb
So let's kick off with the reservoir report.
Geno
No, I'm just gonna jump in and say final resolution sounds too close to some funny hand sign language.
Justin
How do you say Ruby Ridge in Portuguese? All right, well, moving on from that, um, in other news, uh, I guess, yeah, still out here on the lake and I don't know. I mean, nothing much has been going on, uh, but the jet ski hasn't really wanted to be— uh, wanted to start. But that's been happening for years, and, um, it basically just likes a ton of fuel in the carburetors in order to start. So you have to like douse it with starting fluid, which is obnoxious, and it hasn't worked since then. So I bought a new primer pump and I'm gonna install that, so hopefully that'll work. Other than that, uh, my dad's boat, it's getting worked on, uh, at the shop. The dock, uh, the boat lift we ended up fixing mostly, but it needs some new bushings. Uh, so we got to order some bushings before we can get the pontoon out on the lake and, uh, put it on the lift. So still some work to do, but I guess that's all that's really going on with the reservoir report. Uh, it's rained a whole ton, so I guess the level of the lake is higher. So that's good. It's still beautiful out here.
Caleb
That hasn't changed. So basically same shit, different day.
Geno
Ain't that the way to go?
Justin
I mean, there's some movement.
Caleb
Yeah, but it's also East Tennessee. It's kind of tectonic movement.
Justin
No, I just mean there's some movement from— in terms of the aquatic vehiculars.
Caleb
All right. You know, Gino spent a few days, uh, elsewhere in what he claims is the greatest state. How are things going up there on the frozen north that ain't so frozen?
Geno
Yeah, it's been, uh, it's been warm. I think we're looking at a whole week of temps in the 90s coming up here. Um, had a lot of rain last week, got home, went to a real nice hot dog shop up in Bemidji called Lucky Dogs. All the— it's an old service station and all of their hot dogs have automotive-themed names. So if you ever find yourselves up there, good stuff, good stuff. Stop in for a dog.
Caleb
How is the resolution going on, uh, God's least favorite Subaru? Nice.
Geno
Oh, it's gone. It is gone, and I am currently sharing my wife's van.
Caleb
How many more years till the 245 runs?
Geno
You know, I don't want to talk about it. It needs a good solid— it needs a good solid You know, 3, 4 days of work probably, but it's gonna be spread out over quite some time, unfortunately.
Caleb
Should we start doing your car shopping since—
Geno
Well, I—
Justin
no, I was just gonna say I have, I have an addition to the, to the Glizzy report. I ate a Glizzy last night and I discovered existence of something that they called the Grinch Glizzy, which— let me just, uh, let me pull it up real quick so I can describe it. All right, here's what we're looking at. We're looking at a footlong. It's an all-beef frank. It's topped with neon green relish, diced white onions, and red hot barbecue sauce, and it's served with a bag of chips. And they're calling it the Grinch Glizzy because I was at a baseball game last night and the theme was Christmas in July.
Caleb
That is a good—
Geno
that's a good sound, and that's a good sounding dog.
Justin
It is a good sounding dog. Now, I, uh, I will— I'm here to disappoint you all to say that I did not have it. Um, I for some reason just had the one normal Glizzy. It was all right. Um, Then I started drinking and I forgot about eating. I mostly was just thinking about drinking and watching baseball.
Caleb
Those 2 great American pastimes, especially if you're in Wisconsin.
Justin
No, but I gotta say, I gotta say, um, the Knoxville Smokies' new stadium in downtown Knoxville is very impressive.
Caleb
What I'm hearing is more baseball stadiums need to be downtown.
Justin
Well, as long as they do it in the way that they did Here, which they put it in an area that, uh, by putting it there, it didn't really cause too many problems with anybody. It was an abandoned unused warehouse essentially, um, that they tore down and put a baseball stadium on top of. Physically, the location, I think they probably put it in the best place they could have for downtown Knoxville, and it is a beautiful stadium. I'm pretty sure it's an exact copy of At least not in terms of the, the stands or anything per se, but the shape of it is an exact copy of Wrigley Field, I'm pretty sure, which they're a Cubs affiliate. So.
Caleb
I mean, we can't always support good teams. Go Royals.
Justin
I mean, it could be worse.
Geno
Could be the Yankees.
Caleb
Fuck the Yankees.
Justin
Could be the Yankees. Fuck the Yankees.
Caleb
Amen.
Geno
This is an official Yankee hate podcast.
Justin
Yankee hate podcast. We're gonna lose real listeners.
Caleb
I don't think we got that many. I think we're good.
Geno
Like, if we did have listeners in New York, I'm sure they'd be good people. I.e., Mets fans.
Justin
I was about to say, if we had any listeners in New York, they'd be all about the Mets, baby, the Mets!
Caleb
I actually have a live on the scene report that I recorded earlier. When I picked up, well, you'll see. So well, you'll hear. So if you don't mind, I'll hit play on the our live on the scene report before I get into it. Bom dia, champions! We are here at the Feira Livre do Automóvel here in beautiful Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. And as you can see around me, we have lots of vehicles for sale here. It's, uh, basically a flea market for cars, and it is awesome. So I've been out here having a good time, and the Fleet of Hammpions has just added a new member. So more on that later. The Fleet of Hammpions has been expanded by one. Our new shop runner here at the Brazilian studio is a 1988 Fiat Premio. We'll throw pictures up on the skies of blue and all that.
Justin
We need a soundbite. We need a soundboard with clapping and applause.
Caleb
Woo!
Justin
Yeah!
Caleb
We did it, y'all. I finally found a cheap used car that is perfectly cromulent.
Justin
Caleb is finally Fiat-laden.
Caleb
Indeed, indeed. And like this podcast, it is also alcohol fueled. So yep, went down to— But you did work— Feira Livre do Automóvel earlier and looked at it, got a good price, drove it home. Broke the locking gas cap when I stopped to get gas earlier, which that one was fun because it was in, uh, not the greatest part of town. So it was right on the edge of the Complexo do Maré, which is not a great area. We have transportation.
Justin
Didn't you say that your medium-long-term plans are to convert it to non-E100 ethanol and EFI?
Caleb
Making it flex fuel may be a little bit of a stretch, but I'm thinking about it. EFI is definitely in the cards, probably, I'd say probably a year or so, within the next year or so. Uh, gotta, gotta budget for it, but I am thinking EFI conversion. Um, but yeah, I think it'll be good. I think y'all sing pretty good. Maybe set of headers, you know?
Justin
You know, I think there's one thing you're not considering.
Caleb
What am I not considering?
Justin
Small block Chevy.
Caleb
Man, a small block Chevy weighs about half what the car does.
Justin
That's all it— just put a seat on them on the block, you're good to go.
Geno
Uh, Honda K-swap.
Justin
Yeah, K-swap.
Caleb
K-swap.
Justin
I mean, Volkswagen EA888 swap.
Geno
I mean, like, the only problem with a K-swap is it would make the Fiat more reliable than a Fiat has any right to be.
Caleb
Hmm. Yeah, I don't know. They actually have a good reputation here for reliability, so.
Justin
Oh, well, we can fix that. Turbo 1.4 MultiAir from the 500 Abarth swap.
Geno
We can fix it, but can we fix it again, Tony?
Caleb
I mean, if I were to do a swap, which I'm not thinking about, but if I were to swap it, I don't know, maybe, uh, Maybe that '90s Alfa 2-liter twin cam. Ooh, because— nah, the Alfa era was Fiat-based.
Justin
Hmm, but okay, wait, what if we engineered, designed And produced a variable valve timing twin cam head for your Fiat.
Geno
Hmm. What about, what about a Chrysler 2-liter Doc swap?
Caleb
What about a Tiger Shark swap?
Justin
What about an LS motor?
Caleb
LS a world. I mean, they did make a wrong-wheel drive LS, so put the, uh, I think it was a W-body actually, the late W-bodies. Yeah.
Justin
Northstar V8. Northstar.
Caleb
We just love our head gasket swaps around here, y'all.
Justin
Northstar up front, EJ out back.
Caleb
Worst of all worlds. That's the worst of all worlds, man.
Justin
And a— and it's a Fiat in the middle. Oh.
Caleb
The Fiat part's actually pretty nice.
Justin
I mean, you know, I feel like— look, I'm not a religious man, but I feel like if you did that to one of those Fiats, you're going to hell.
Caleb
You know, I think I agree with that assessment. And this one is, uh, this one's actually fairly nice, at least inside. It's got the original seats and it's kind of a confetti pattern, which is pretty cool.
Justin
And that's fun.
Caleb
Yeah, little 1300. So about, according to the documents, 59,000 Brazilian ponies.
Justin
Hell yeah. I thought of a way to expound on what I said. You're not just going to hell after you die. You're going to hell because you're going to have a Fiat that's got a Northstar and an EJ in it.
Geno
What about that? What about that Mitsu 3.0 that they put in like the, in the performance K cars? Like the Sundance Duster?
Caleb
That could be— What about the old—
Justin
what about the old 305 diesel?
Geno
What about that, that 468 diesel?
Caleb
Yeah, yeah, that variable displacement.
Justin
What about an— what about an LT with a Doug Nash 4+3? Or whatever the hell that thing's called.
Caleb
Yeah, that Doug Nash 4-3 is— it is definitely something.
Justin
Does that technically mean it has 7 forward gears? I know one of them's an overdrive, but still. Or is it 3 overdrives? I think it's 3 overdrives. It's like a 4-speed manual that, that has like 3 fucking auto overdrives or some shit. It's the weirdest thing.
Geno
It's a push-button overdrive for the top 3 gears.
Justin
So, uh, we were talking about how throttle body injection, uh, If you purposely took a car that didn't have it and put that on it, you're crazy. Well, I think we're coming up with the ultimate troll car. We got throttle body injection, we got a Doug Nash, but we gotta not put it on an LT. It's gotta be a worse engine.
Caleb
Diesel 350. That's it. Diesel 350.
Justin
Diesel, diesel 350 with a Doug Nash.
Caleb
And, uh, for—
Justin
it wouldn't have throttle body injection. It would be, it would be mechanical fuel injection because it's a diesel. So it has to be a gas motor.
Caleb
All right. Good point. Good point.
Geno
I'm telling you, the Cadillac 468, it's the worst motor we can think of.
Justin
All right. Cadillac 468 with a Doug Nash and TBI.
Geno
I don't know.
Caleb
And the 40—
Geno
oh no, no.
Caleb
The 4100.
Justin
The G— the—
Caleb
That, uh, 4100 that Cadillac had before the Northstar.
Justin
I don't know anything about it.
Caleb
Oh yeah, it just had a thing with, uh, making the lobes on the cam into circles, you know, minor stuff.
Justin
Oh no, you know what? This is too interesting because that would still pique some— that would still pique like car masochists' interest, right? That's not the engine.
Caleb
Iron Duke.
Justin
That's close, but that's too reliable. We're talking, we're talking Kia Theta 2.4. Oh, the one that has the oil consumption issues.
Caleb
There you go. Drop the mic. Theta 2.4 with throttle body injection.
Justin
Theta 2.4 throttle body injection, a Doug Nash 4.3, and package it all up in the most wonderful vehicle you could possibly package something so trash in. Oh, what could it be?
Caleb
What could it be?
Justin
No. No, it has to, it has to be—
Caleb
no, no, no.
Justin
The thing is, is the drivetrain has to be so unfitting for the vehicle. That's why it's a troll car. So we're throwing this in. Oh my goodness. Oh my goodness.
Geno
Um, Volkswagen Fox.
Justin
No, it's too light.
Caleb
I've got the answer for you.
Justin
What?
Caleb
Mid-'90s Cadillac Brougham sedan. You know, the— oh, the Fleetwood. Mid-'90s Cadillac Fleetwood.
Justin
Oh, that's an answer. That's an answer. Wait, but it— but the thing is, is that it'd still be comfortable. It'd still be a nice experience, even though it'd be mildly annoying and trash. So hold up. Hold up. It still has to move the vehicle. So I can't say like F-600 dump truck. Um, what would be— what would that drivetrain just be absolutely a nightmare in? Rolls-Royce Phantom. No, because that would still be— that would still be super comfortable. Yeah, what do you got?
Geno
Well, here we go.
Caleb
F-100.
Geno
'75 AMC Matador.
Caleb
But the Matador was actually somewhat comfortable.
Justin
Gremlin.
Geno
But it looks like a bag of smashed assholes.
Justin
No, but this, this, it has to make you upset that you're in it. It has to be like a penalty box of some sort, but has to be heavy. What is like a garbage, like truck?
Caleb
I mean, I could say square body, but I would offend most of our listeners, myself included. Because I like the square body, but it is not a comfortable place to spend time.
Justin
Oh, oh, oh, we're throwing this in a Kia Borrego.
Caleb
But it can't have air conditioning. And you gotta drive it in Alabama during the summer.
Justin
Oh, we're throwing this in an Astro van with no side windows.
Caleb
The Astro was good though. But, uh, that—
Geno
but 4-door Wrangler.
Caleb
Oh, oh, oh, that's gross.
Geno
Or I guess we could make it even worse and say Gladiator.
Caleb
Yeah, let's make it a Gladiator.
Justin
Yeah, let's make it a Jeep Gladiator. All right, so the worst car we could possibly think of, a Jeep Gladiator lifted, squatted, squatted Jeep Gladiator. With the Doug Nash 4.3, a Kia Theta II, and throttle body injection.
Geno
I don't think I like cars anymore.
Justin
Welcome to the real world, son. This is a man's truck.
Caleb
Jeep Gladiator.
Justin
If you're not suffering, you're not living.
Geno
Like, man—
Justin
Brought to you by— never mind.
Geno
Stellantis had to like just be so glad when the, uh, when the Cybertruck came out. So finally there was an uglier, shittier truck on the market than the Gladiator.
Justin
That's why they called it the Glad-eater.
Geno
It's like, the funny thing is too, if they'd actually had the stones to make it a proper 2-door truck, it wouldn't have looked terrible.
Caleb
No, it would have looked fantastic if it was a 2-door.
Geno
But as a 4-door, it looks awful.
Justin
They could have called the 4-door the Gladiator, and then they could have made a short bed Short cab, basically two-door, and they could have called it the Comanche.
Geno
Honestly, I would love to get a Jeep Comanche.
Caleb
The Comanche was an amazing vehicle.
Geno
It's an XJ with a bed; you can't go wrong.
Caleb
Exactly. I mean, I drive.
Justin
Ooh, did they? Okay. I learned recently that they made the XJ in China on. Um, or, uh, with permission or whatever, uh, until 2014. Um, did they also make the Comanche?
Caleb
I don't think they did, but that's nothing a Sawzall can't fix.
Justin
All I'm saying is I would like— I would, I would kill for like a 2014 Chinese Comanche, you know. Probably has some, probably has some random-ass diesel in it. It probably is the greatest thing you've ever seen in your life.
Geno
Like, what a perfect little truck.
Caleb
Yeah, it is. It really is just a perfect little truck. You can make your own. I mean, all you need is a Sawzall and a stick welder. And then they actually made a pickup version of my car called the Fiorino, which was basically They cut it off behind the doors and put a pickup bed on it.
Geno
Nice.
Justin
If a tree ever falls on the roof of the Stagea, you know what's happening.
Geno
Yep. Stagea ute would be incredible.
Justin
Stagea ute would be way— I get the Australians have to be on this already.
Caleb
They've got to be on this. I mean, The real question is, wouldn't you have to change a badge to RS4T for truck?
Justin
The Australians are on it already. There's multiple examples.
Geno
Of course there is. I'm sure every one of them's got a slab of VB in the back too.
Justin
It honestly— okay, most of them look stupid, to be fair, because they've cut off the rear doors, and honestly, it just doesn't Or they like half did it and it just doesn't look great, especially with an R34 front end. Oh no, okay, I see one of them that looks pretty good. That might be— okay, one of them looks all right, but no, the one that I see that I actually am inspired by looks like a Subaru Baja. Oh, it's still got all 4 doors and they just cut off the back. That, that's the one.
Geno
Oh, that is pretty sick.
Caleb
That would be sick.
Geno
I mean, although There's like a purple one that's coming up on the image search. That's a 2-door that actually looks pretty good, I think.
Justin
Yeah, that's what I thought was maybe AI.
Caleb
For me, you know, putting dumb ideas and, you know, mocking up dumb ideas and stuff, I mean, you don't need AI and a bunch of data centers for it. You just need a Sawzall and a stick welder.
Justin
Look, if you want to brainstorm ideas with some stuff, whatever. I'm just saying this looks suspicious. And also it was posted on Twitter. last year, yeah, it's probably AI. So the only issue with that is that doesn't— that execution is not necessarily— you can't necessarily execute the vision of the AI, and it seems the real ones don't look as good when it actually has been executed.
Caleb
Again, if you're good enough with the stick welder, you can probably pull it off.
Justin
I think it'd be easier just to go do the Baja style one because I think you could pull that off easier.
Caleb
Yeah, maybe. Yeah, I can see it because what you do, you take the tailgate off, you kind of trim up the tailgate a little bit and shape the roofline a little and, you know, basically use the tailgate to make your, uh, your rear panel there. And then yeah, just, you know, here with some bed liner, uh, probably fab up, I don't know, maybe Danger Range or something like that as your tailgate donor, you know, trim it up a little bit.
Justin
No, it'd have to be a Frontier.
Caleb
True.
Justin
Or like, or a Nissan pickup, like a hardbody.
Caleb
I think I'd rather sacrifice a Frontier.
Justin
So in '97 they were making the Frontier. The hardbody was done by that point.
Caleb
Yep. I'd say, um, maybe Frontier. Frontier.
Justin
I forget what they called that gen Frontier everywhere else, but isn't it like the Navara or something?
Caleb
Yeah, it's a Navara.
Justin
Yeah, so that's still like— I think they sold that shit everywhere, so like you could still get that like—
Caleb
Oh, absolutely.
Justin
I, I think it would still be fitting if you were trying to be like I'm going to go with Nissan parts of the era that possibly would be even around in Japan.
Caleb
The only reason I'm real diehard against sacrificing a hardbody, because I mean, it's '90s Nissan. I mean, you think about it and it rusts.
Justin
I can tell you that. Hashtag save our hardbodies.
Caleb
Save our hardbodies. I don't know what you think, Jano.
Geno
Oh boy, I'll try to avoid thinking whenever possible, but I've just been looking at pictures of that Stagea ute and getting kind of excited.
Justin
I'm seeing what you sent. Yeah, that other picture is a point in the real— yeah, no, it's real. You're right, because that other photo shows it. It looks pretty good like that. Yeah, it looks like a— it looks like a freaking, uh, it looks a lot like a Commodore. Like a Commodore ute. Yeah.
Caleb
I'm betting you— I would bet you money that a Commodore sacrificed— like a Commodore ute sacrificed its B-pillar to make that truck.
Geno
I'd believe that.
Justin
It looks good. And actually, yeah, I'm convinced it's real now. Thanks for— I'm okay. All right, now, now, now, if the Stagia's roof ever gets compromised, it's happening.
Caleb
It's happening.
Geno
Oh, that's just— it's so dirty. I love it.
Justin
It is. It's a drift bitch.
Geno
Yeah, like a little, little Stagia ute drift missile. God, I love that.
Justin
That's insane. And especially like taking some of that weight off the rear helps even more for drifting, I'm sure. That's crazy.
Caleb
Oh, absolutely.
Justin
God, that's— now I'm hyped.
Geno
I'm gonna come visit and just do some really, you know, uh—
Justin
Hey, hey, hey, hey, keep your hands off the Sawzall.
Geno
Irresponsible forestry near your car.
Justin
Look, it might happen anyway. I'm out here in the woods. There are trees that are threatening everywhere.
Caleb
Hey, all you need is one good storm.
Justin
And they've been happening. I'm not saying I want it to happen. I'm just saying it's surprisingly— not surprisingly, but it's unfortunately not actually all that unlikely.
Caleb
Yeah. I mean, I used to joke that, uh, Zalzal And a stick welder and a garden sprayer full of gasoline solve most of your problems.
Geno
Can't say I disagree.
Caleb
Especially if you got fire ants. Oh man, let me tell you though, I've been, I've been longing for a garden sprayer full of gasoline in the backyard recently. 'Cause the aforementioned fire ants. Bless our hearts.
Justin
Fight fire with fire.
Caleb
Amen, brother. Amen. You know, sometimes you just need an old garden sprayer full of gasoline there and, uh, you know, it's, uh, the full, uh, dead bug treatment.
Geno
Oh, a thing I didn't mention when we were up in, uh, up in Bemidji, I had to go to L&M Fleet Supply to pick up Uh, some oil change stuff for my sister-in-law's lawnmower.
Caleb
Yeah. How was L&M compared to the old Fleet Farm and, uh, Menards?
Geno
It's a little different. It's right next to the Menards there. Um, it's not as big as a Fleet Farm, but they got some cool stuff. I, I was gonna mention, I walked right in the door and they had a display on an end cap With the Pulsefire LRT.
Justin
Oh.
Geno
Which is basically a flamethrower you can buy for $600 American.
Caleb
Freedom.
Geno
Uh, Exothermic, if you want to, uh, if you want to sponsor our podcast, we're available to take your money. Or product samples.
Caleb
Absolutely. For product samples, uh, send us about 3 or 4. I did actually have, uh, did actually bring a topic I wanted to throw out here for the table. And, uh, that is driving music.
Justin
Oh yeah.
Caleb
Like driving music, driving vibes.
Justin
You know, other than obviously the sultry sounds of this podcast, which can only be played in a car with speakers from anywhere from the 1970s to the 1990s. If you're listening to this podcast in a newer vehicle or are listening to this podcast in an older vehicle that has speakers that are newer, That's illegal and you need to stop. No, I'm kidding. I'm kidding. Don't, don't, don't stop. We need all the listeners we can get.
Caleb
Yep. We are currently— we're about $40 in the hole on this podcast project and we'd like to undo that at some point. No.
Justin
And I guess the better way of putting it is this. This podcast is best enjoyed on a retro sound system.
Caleb
Ooh, that's how you get the, uh, that's how you get— do we still say hipster these days?
Geno
I just sent a link to the chat with some very obscure driving music.
Caleb
The Legend of Blacktop Jesus. By Andy Lipke.
Geno
This is actually a bad, um, a band that I'm assuming he was in called North Shore Trio, who I saw perform live in Duluth years ago and bought this CD from them, and then they disappeared from the internet for a bit. But it's a, it's a solid album. Yeah.
Justin
I, I'm sorry, I just tried to Google what's the modern equivalent of hipsters, and I was scrolling through a Reddit question. Of course, somebody said femboys. No, no. I think what I would say is it's the performative male stereotype. I think that's what people call it now. is performative male.
Caleb
Ah, yeah, those folks. Bless their hearts.
Justin
Those folks. Yeah, bless their hearts.
Geno
Sounds about right.
Caleb
As I said, I'm not all up on this, uh, new age lingo, whatever. You know, a bit old-fashioned down here in the Brazilian studio. But yeah, it's just Why go through the trouble of being performative? I mean, just be a decent human being.
Geno
Yep.
Justin
Now see, I try and keep my toes at least a little bit dipped in the pool of what's hip. Because I'm, I'm trying to— I'm trying not to be old. I'm getting old. So I'm the— I'm your touch— I'm your cultural touchstone for what's what the kids are saying these days. But I'm still, I'm still starting to feel out of it. And that's, that's rough. He's our resident youth. And yeah, I'm the resident youth.
Geno
Yes.
Caleb
He's a youth around here.
Geno
He's our youth liaison.
Caleb
Yep. Coming to you live with the Reservoir Report. And the youth liaison, Justin.
Justin
Yeah, this is what the kids are up to these days. Oh Lord.
Caleb
But trying to think, Justin, you got a good driving album suggestion?
Justin
I do. I have a fan— I, I have, I have the first one that popped in my mind, but then like 7 others popped up. First one that popped to my mind is Songs for the Deaf by Queens of the Stone Age.
Caleb
Oh, that's a good one. Queens of the Stone Age is always good. So I would say—
Justin
And it's— I just want to elaborate that that's the theme of the album, is it's a road trip.
Caleb
Nice, nice.
Justin
There's like interludes with radio, uh, interludes and radio, the sounds and like, you know, like changing stations and like, it's, it's like you're, I think the theme of it is like you're going through a road trip in the middle of the Southwest desert and you pick up like a, you'll like even occasionally you'll pick up a vague like Mexican Spanish station or whatever. And like, that's what the, that's why there's those little interludes in that album.
Geno
You know what else is a really good album for driving through that area? The Animal Years by Josh Ritter.
Justin
I don't know that one.
Geno
Check it out. It's, uh, it's just a solid, solid album. Um, came out, I think, early 2000s and kind of just really captured the feel of that era in a— I would call it Americana. It's Country-ish, but not really. It's, it's a rock. It's just a great album. Um, I would go so far as to like call it a perfect album. Like, there's not a bad track on it.
Caleb
Oh, that's a good one. All right, I've got a couple, um, and they're kind of mood dependent. But if I'm— let's say I'm driving out through literally just nowhere with nothing around, like very little around. Out Loud by Boom Boom Satellites is just an absolutely amazing long drive album.
Justin
That— the name of that band rings a bell, but I don't think I I couldn't name you a song of theirs.
Caleb
Also, just their album, the album art for that album. It is just— the album art is incredible. All right.
Geno
We'll just have to compile these in the show notes, I think.
Justin
For sure.
Caleb
We absolutely will.
Justin
I'll also say literally anything by Pendulum. Yeah.
Caleb
So I've got to say Alpine A110 album cover.
Justin
Oh, oh, that's the album cover.
Caleb
Yeah.
Justin
Oh, that's fire.
Caleb
It's a picture of an A110.
Justin
All right, I'm gonna bring in an entirely different vibe because like I said, anything by Pendulum, that's fucking fire for driving. But I'm thinking like more upbeat sort of vibes. I feel like Queens of the Stone Age, um, there is some slightly slower stuff, but it's mostly an upbeat album.
Caleb
Right.
Justin
Um, like really driving beats, and which is the point. And it kind of does work for any mood. It's not really a mood-dependent album because you can You can channel your anger into it, but you also can channel sadness into it. You can channel loneliness into it, or you can channel happiness into it. It's a pretty universal album to just, if you need to feel something, you'll find whatever you need to feel in the album. But with energy. It's definitely not slow sad. It's more of a theatrical sad, if anything.
Caleb
Right. Like longing.
Justin
sort of vibe, right? Pendulum stuff's obviously just drum and bass, high, high, you know, rockish drum and bass, really high energy. So that's great for if you're spirited driving. But to totally change the vibe, another entire fantastic underrated driving— I guess it's not an album. It's Three 6 Mafia.
Geno
Okay.
Justin
But either way, it was like the early hits, like '95, like '90, '91 to '95 or whatever. And it's got stuff like Ride, like the early versions of like Ridin' in the Chevy.
Caleb
And that's good.
Justin
That's all you need to know. It's a song called Ridin' in the Chevy.
Geno
Mm-hmm.
Justin
If you haven't heard it, fucking bump it and just put yourself in that sort of mindset where You're riding in a frickin' donk Impala or something in Memphis, and you're probably high as fuck, and you're feeling cool as shit. So now don't, don't necessarily actually go and do that. Just picture yourself there, and that's, that's enough. But—
Caleb
Yeah, like when I had the '65 Oldsmobile, 'Cause I had 65 volts '98 at one point. I did listen to an awful lot of Public Enemy in it, but—
Justin
And just, just pretty much, if, if you like, if you want to, if you can properly get yourself into the mindset of listening to that, that sort of shit. And you put yourself in the music and you're, and you're listening to something like Charging These Hoes. Like, it's, it's some of the best driving music, but just in it, it's not— it's cruising music. It's not spirited driving music. It's, it's slamming down the highway music.
Caleb
Yeah. Like, I used to—
Justin
well, not even, not even Not even slamming down the highway. It's, I'm in the right lane doing the speed limit, but I got one hand on the wheel and I'm leaned back vibing sort of music. That doesn't mean I'm like, doesn't mean I'm chilling. I might even be upset. But I'm vibing.
Caleb
So kind of on this theme, when I had the big olds, I'd do that blasting You're Gonna Get Yours by Public Enemy. 'Cause, you know, like part of a song he was talking about his '98, you know, his old '98. And I'm rolling here, you know, '65, old '98, you know, full super rocket 425 under the hood, all of that. It was a good old time.
Justin
But now one of my favorite quotes from Three 6 Mafia is, uh, in Riding Spinners. And, um, Basically, Juicy J— I think it's Juicy J— he's in an— he is in a Ford Expedition and he is cruising, uh, that is on spinners, of course. And, um, he is cruising down to Knoxville in his Ford Expedition, and I find that extremely relatable. Maybe not the spinners, but the rest of it is extremely relatable. Yeah.
Caleb
Yeah. So I've got a couple more albums I'm gonna throw out there for kind of all-time greats for driving music. The first one is kind of obvious. Gran Turismo by the Cardigans.
Justin
Bless us.
Caleb
Someone—
Justin
absolutely, absolutely.
Caleb
You know, I feel like I'm a kid. I'm a child of the '90s. I admit it. I've played way too much Gran Turismo over the years.
Justin
Oh yeah, no, I was literally just talking about the fact that somebody was talking about the Cardigans yesterday because one of my, um, a new friend that I met, um, and, uh, because Love Fool came on and they're like, oh my God, I didn't know about them, but I really have gotten into the Cardigans a lot recently and they're so great. And I was like, I got into the Cardigans because of a fucking racing game.
Caleb
Dude, they named an album after that racing game.
Justin
Yeah, I know. I don't know why, but I love it.
Caleb
And it's just, you know, there's just something about it because, you know, Love Fool was from Gran Turismo. Yeah, Fool was on the Gran Turismo album.
Justin
Yeah, it's their best. I mean, it's their most popular album.
Caleb
Like, there's just something about, you know, putting on My Fate, like when you're merging onto the freeway and you put your foot down and you just that first few hits of My Favorite Game come on, you know, with a little drum bit.
Justin
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is that in My Favorite Song? That needs to be— that— if that's not on my playlist right now, it—
Caleb
it—
Justin
I'm, I'm gonna be disappointed in myself.
Caleb
And it's like you hear that initial drum bit from My Favorite Game and you're merging on the freeway. And it's just, you know, like you hear the air sucking into that single barrel carburetor and then, you know, just like—
Justin
I need to go, I need to go smash some back roads tonight while blasting that Nostalgia.
Caleb
You absolutely need to blast some back roads.
Justin
So fitting. And that car, my car was in the game.
Caleb
Your car was in the game. You need to do that. Like, just flat out, you need to do it. And the other one—
Justin
Flat out. Hey, shout out FlatOut, the racing series. That was a good game.
Caleb
Was a good game. The other one, which this one might come out of left field a little bit, but Slow Ride over New Zero Canada. By Godspeed, You Black Emperor.
Justin
Ooh, I mean, I'm not surprised with Godspeed, but I haven't heard that.
Caleb
Like, Godspeed, really all of their albums, but Godspeed is just— Godspeed is amazing for road trips. You know, it's just, you're out there, you're middle of nowhere. driving at night, you know, just like points of light from the other vehicles, and you just crank it and it's just a mood. It's an atmosphere. And I'm about 80% sure I was listening to Godspeed in this wagon when I run you down on the tail of a dragon. On the 740 treadwear Michelins.
Justin
Hell yeah.
Caleb
In a Regina 940 with 2 canoes in the back of it. And I am never going to let you live that down because you were on Pilot Super Sports in that IS300.
Justin
I guess I just wasn't going— I wasn't going nearly hard enough.
Caleb
You had double the power, way better tires, and I was running you down every time the road got twisty. Yup.
Justin
All right, all right, all right. I got 2 unconventional recommendations.
Caleb
Let's hear 'em.
Justin
One of them isn't really a recommendation, it's just a surprising observation, and that's one time Okay. The album Honestly Nevermind by Drake is not a fantastic album, and a lot of people shit on it. So I'm going to get hate for this opinion. But the first time I listened to it was on a road trip to Mississippi, and it was like, it was from like midnight or 1 a.m. to like 3 a.m. or whatever when I was listening to it. And it was in the middle of nowhere on the highway.
Caleb
Oh, yeah.
Justin
And it just, it worked. It worked. It just, it worked perfectly for that scenario. So I guess if you're ever going to listen to Honestly Nevermind, listen to it on a really late night road trip. I think you might be woozy enough to deal with it being Drake. Maybe.
Geno
I'm gonna say— I think any of their albums work for this, but I'm gonna specifically say Zeppelin IV.
Justin
Zeppelin IV? Really?
Geno
Yeah.
Justin
Is that the— is that— is that the one with, um— oh, which one's Zeppelin IV?
Geno
It's the one with Stairway.
Justin
Okay.
Caleb
Stairway is a really good driving song.
Justin
Oh, okay. IV is the one with the painting. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Black Dog, Rock and Roll, Stairway. Yeah, yeah, yep. No, that's not unconventional at all. That's a fantastic driving album.
Geno
That's like— it's cliché, and any Zeppelin album works, but Zeppelin IV is the perfect example.
Justin
Yes, it is. It is. Yes. Zeppelin IV is the best out of those. My other— so my actual unconventional recommendation would be The album Scream by Scream from 2006, the dubstep artist Scream. It's OG British dubstep. We're talking the wobbly wubby wubs, but we're not talking the Skrillex-y sounds. And once again, for a super late night drive, there's, there's, there's almost nothing better if you're just trying to completely vibe out and turn your brain off.
Caleb
Like, I'm sure, Gino, Gino, I'm sure you've got other recommendations.
Geno
Oh, I'm just— I do. I'm trying to think of what they would be now. It's on the spot. Um, like I said, I'm going to go, uh, Legend of Blacktop Jesus is a great one.
Caleb
Absolutely.
Geno
What else have I just put on? Uh, See, I'm of the burned CDs age, so I would always burn CDs for my road trips back in the day.
Caleb
So I am also of the burned CDs age, but what I would do is I would burn albums, or— and then later on I went to the iPod and I would just play full albums.
Justin
But take your pick, one of the first 3 Lynyrd Skynyrd albums. No, first 4.
Geno
Yeah.
Caleb
Yep.
Justin
Yeah, one of the first— not the live album in '75, but one of the first 4 Skynyrd albums. Take your pick, take a trip, you'll have a good time.
Caleb
I mean, there's a I have driven across Northern Alabama in a rented Mustang convertible with the top down, stereo turned all the way up, blasting Freebird while seeing how fast I could go from Huntsville to Florence. So I get it.
Geno
Freebird's just an all-time driving song.
Caleb
It is an all-time great driving song.
Justin
But so is Saturday Night Special.
Caleb
Hell, so is Sweet Home Alabama.
Justin
So is—
Geno
Gimme 3 Steps.
Justin
Gimme 3 Steps.
Caleb
Gimme 3 Steps.
Geno
Hell, so is Simple Man.
Caleb
See, I cannot listen to Simple Man when I cry because I cry when I listen to Simple Man.
Justin
Yeah, me too. Me too. That's a song I've cried to a few times. I Need You is a good one. And so is— and That Smell, I wouldn't— That Smell's a good driving song too. All of them.
Caleb
It's an okay driving song.
Geno
Have you heard the, the Shinedown cover of Simple Man? Because it's surprisingly excellent.
Justin
Yeah, I'm not surprised. Shinedown's good.
Caleb
Yeah, Shinedown is good. I'll give them that. So my couple— I'm gonna go in here with a couple of left-field takes. One of them's kind of getting into that '70s vibe too. Because as our listeners are about to find out, I'm maybe the youngest diehard Jethro Tull fan in the world.
Geno
Hey, you know, nothing wrong with some happy horses when you're feeling thick as a brick.
Caleb
I inherited this disease, and I say this knowing that my dad Used to run around Jackson, Tennessee blasting Aqualung and Thick as a Brick on an 8-track in a Datsun 510.
Justin
Hell yeah.
Caleb
And I did not fall very far from that tree.
Justin
All right, let me tell you about The Resistance by Muse.
Geno
Yes.
Caleb
Muse is just amazing for driving.
Justin
If you want something theatrical and epic, it's got you. Speaking of Muse, so they haven't made a good album since 2012, and they just put out a new album, uh, The Wow Signal, I think it's called. And lo and behold, they're back, baby. They figured it out. It's a good album.
Caleb
It's good.
Justin
It legitimately is really good.
Geno
I have another Somewhat obscure and out of left field, but both, uh, the albums Lo Hi-O and Electric Rock Music by the Ass Ponies are great to drive around to.
Justin
Fantastic.
Caleb
You know, and I'm gonna throw this one out there since we're going that way with our band names. Candy Ass by Orgy.
Geno
All right.
Caleb
It's a shockingly good driving— well, not as shockingly good, it legitimately is a good driving album. And I know the folks at Sport Compact Car kind of panned it in the era, but so was Vapor Transmission. It was a good album. And, uh, I cannot tell you how many times I bounced a Volvo S60 with the manual off its rev limiter driving through Nashville about 2 o'clock in the morning while blasting Vapor Transmission.
Geno
Um, I'm also gonna throw out some from, uh, from my misspent youth. I'm gonna say, uh, Enema of the State from Blink-182. As well as Californication by the Chili Peppers.
Caleb
Californication is— I remember when that one came out.
Geno
I know it's not the correct choice, but it's the one that was in my best friend's car in high school.
Justin
Yeah. I got, I got a left field one. Funeral Soundtrack Number 4 by Destroy Boys.
Caleb
All right, I'm following you.
Justin
Uh, it's a, it's a like feminist punk band.
Caleb
All right.
Justin
Um, yeah, like in the tradition of— in the rich tradition of feminist punk bands like, uh, Riot Grrrl and such.
Caleb
Mm-hmm.
Justin
But, um, yeah, it's just hard-driving punk rock. I mean, what— that's all I need to say. It's angry.
Caleb
Bigger, Better, Faster, More by Four Non Blondes.
Justin
Oh wow.
Caleb
That album, just, I mean, pop it in the cassette deck, pop in the CD, hit play on the iPod, whatever, just hit it. Hit the road and just, I mean, I cannot tell you how many times I was driving 71, you know, heading south out of Kansas City and just screaming along with, uh, what's up.
Geno
Oh man. I don't know how I left this off of there. Sailing the Seas of Cheese by Primus.
Justin
Oh yeah, Primus. Primus is— yeah, anything Primus.
Caleb
Yeah.
Justin
Hold on, I'm gonna forget all— I'm gonna forget these. I have to say them right now. Reload by Metallica, for sure. British Steel by Judas Priest. I think that's what it's called. And, uh, uh, uh, oh, I forgot the third one.
Geno
The Tony Hawk Pro Skater soundtrack.
Justin
That reminded me of the greatest driving soundtrack of any media of all time. And that is the Eurobeat that is in Initial D.
Geno
Yes.
Justin
I can't believe I forgot Eurobeat.
Caleb
That's very low-hanging fruit.
Justin
Yeah, but that is the driving music. My multiple friends of mine have crashed because we started playing Eurobeat and they started driving too fast.
Geno
Oh man, like, like, what was the— like any of the songs that are on any of the music stations in Vice City?
Caleb
Yes, absolutely, yes. I'm gonna drop— I said I was done. I've got one more because talking about actual soundtracks brought this up. Ghost in the Shell: Stand Alone Complex, specifically the first OST, uh, is just absolutely 100% amazing. And There is just something almost magical, like, with, like, the initial beats of Rise by Orihiga on the soundtrack. Because, you know, the whole thing was composed by Yoko Kanno, who also did the soundtrack for Cowboy Bebop.
Justin
So that's the kind of team you're working with. Yeah, there's so much— there's so much— so many anime soundtracks that have fantastic or like Japanese video games and stuff that have soundtracks, the original soundtracks that are just insane for driving.
Caleb
But like the initial bits of Rise, like with the initial, like the vocals when they just hit initially and it's like you hit the key on your RX-7 and you put the pop-ups up and like they come up as like the vocals do the little crescendo at the beginning. and then just slide it into gear and start buzzing off into the sunset as the song hits. Magical, magical moment.
Justin
It's 4 exclusive genres. We have 2 rock, and obviously, like I said, there's always exceptions, but we have 2 rock, 2 electronic. We got— or dance, I guess. We got punk and metal in rock. are best for driving overall. And I would say drum and bass and— well, that also drum and bass and like jungle at the same time. And honestly, just house music. House music is perfect sometimes.
Caleb
I'm gonna add one more to this, and it's post-rock. Because sometimes you need a big atmospheric soundtrack for where you're driving or what you're driving across.
Justin
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. I'll add, I'll add in then. Yeah. Anything that's super atmospheric. So like shoegaze, post-rock, even ambient stuff depending on the vibe. That can be perfect for, for driving as well.
Caleb
I mean, there's just, there is something almost transcendent about blasting across the Arizona desert in a Volvo 244, blasting, just blasting Mogwai or Godspeed. As you're just heading, you know, the sun is just down below the horizon and the sky is just— it's just—
Justin
I got one more because it's in the same vein. Stoner metal or stoner rock. Yeah, it's, it's all super— it's all super like, not all of it, but the stuff I like is all super atmospheric. And just epic, just like it builds into like a giant crescendo. And when you have like when you're driving in a beautiful environment and a mountain comes over the, the like you're, you cross a hill and you see mountains in the distance or something and there's a beautiful vista and like the, the, the song really starts to crescendo and build.
Geno
Yeah.
Justin
Tears get shed.
Caleb
Absolutely, absolutely. And I see a smile on Gino's face.
Geno
Here, I'm gonna go obscure again. This might just be another me thing too, and I'm gonna make sure I get the album name exactly right, but I believe it is the sophomore album from, uh, German techno artist Blümchen, also known as Jasmin Wagner.
Caleb
This, this kind of content is why we are friends, folks. Listeners, you're hearing it right here.
Geno
The album, or the album's Die Welt gehört dir. The lead song off of it is Die Welt gehört mir.
Caleb
Oh, I'm, I am picking this up. I'm I'm here with you.
Geno
Oh yeah, I think we've got to throw Autobahn on our driving albums.
Justin
Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Caleb
Over like 1970s German electronic rock is just you've got Can Neuf, Kraftwerk, Tangerine Dream. It was 81, Exit by Tangerine Dream. And I think that is a good note to exit.
Geno
I think so. I think that's a pod, gentlemen.
Justin
I suppose that's a pod.
Geno
All right, y'all, check your oil.
Caleb
All right, y'all, we'll see you next time.
Justin
Check your tie rods. All right, see y'all.